Therapy

I started therapy today. I really like the counselor. She is different from the one I originally called because my dates got messed up and I missed my first appointment. Since that counselor could not see me until August 13 I called a place called Fertile Hope Program for Healing. She said on the phone that the reason she does this is because she has been through IF. So in a way I am glad I missed my appointment with the other place.

We just talked about the basics today and how angry I am. That I have let myself become completely isolated because of not being able to see pregnant people and children. She told me that is fine for now that it is a protection I am doing for myself. It was a very good session and she validated my feelings well. She wants me to write letters to my three babies. The letters are going to be hard but I will try. I made another appointment for next week.

I am very sad today because I think my 15 year old cat is getting sick and won't be here much longer. Her and her sister were my first pets after moving out on my own. They have been through a lot with me. Many boyfriends, the drug and alcohol years, several jobs, houses and married life. I just hate that I can't do anything for her right now but let her rest. She is a great pet and I just hate to lose her when I have dealt with so much loss recently.